Moving is stressful!

Though this isn't a shock to most people (except me it seems), moving is STRESSFUL. As I take everything in stride, I thought a move across an entire ocean would be a walk in the park. Not only a move mind you, but a new job, waiting for a visa, a feature film to entirely rewrite and a half marathon to train for. Yikes. Stress city.

Somehow, I thought I was hiding it well. I was totally fine. But how could all of those things not do something to you. It took going back to London a couple weeks ago to realize I wasn't happy these past three months. It wasn't the job - everyone is great. It wasn't always the script (though there were a number of weeks that I thought I was a horrible writer and I'd never be able to write again).

I missed my friends. I missed understanding social norms. Sometimes I stayed out way longer with people I didn't want to be with just cause I wanted to go out. On top of that, I ate and drank for England and stopped training altogether. It made me feel fuller, even if I was eating my way to a heart attack.

A week before coming back to England, I finally put on my trainers and ran around prospect park. I ran 35 minutes without stopping and I cried when I was done. Cried all the way home. I realized that part of me thought I really couldn't do it. All of my normal confidence was gone. An unfamiliar place with unfamiliar people when you're stressed to the gills can do that to you.

Even worse, I stepped on the scales in England and realized I'm almost 200 pounds. I was in shock. For years, I was 150 pounds but once I started working in offices and having more money to eat out whenever I wanted, the pounds started piling up, even more so since I've been in the US trying to fill the people shaped void with food. (They are not the same shape if you are wondering.)

But going back home to London and finally getting my visa in my hand and finishing my screenplay, I realized I am ready for the New York adventure. It was just that I had too many things in the way of me realizing it. I also figured out that I hate where I'm living right now and need light and a proper kitchen and a place that is home, more than anything else.

As I search for the perfect place, I have wonderful colleagues and, dare I say, friends here to make the transition easier. I'm out running four times a week and have gone on the GI diet (thanks Rick Gallop for writing a normal eating plan ) and back to eating vegan for the most part to help me get back into eating healthy. A week in and I'm starting to feel more like my old self even if I don't look like it and my legs continually ache.

Tomorrow, I'm getting new trainers to tackle the great wall (psst - you can donate to cancer research who I'm running for here: www.justgiving.com/c242k) and then I'm going to run stairs pretending I'm Rocky Balboa. I'll pretend he did it in New York. I'm sure no one will know the difference.