It wasn’t until the bombings on the 7th of July, 2005 in London that being in a different country and being so far away from home became a bigger issue to me and my loved ones.
I realized that with the events that occurred within those 36 hours in July that I didn't mail home enough. Who will think something happened to me? Will someone tell them? Would anyone think to ask? But this type of tragedy sparks contact and suddenly you're hearing from people you haven't spoken to in years - you're in Rehab? I'm sure I'd love to wave at seagulls in the Pacific. Wow-3 kids in 3 years? All by surrogate mums? And you haven't bathed in all that time? Crazy...
But seriously, it was surreal here. We were all meant to keep working, to keep our heads up and I just couldn't concentrate. Just couldn't get my head around it all. Couldn't think. Or I’d just keep thinking - God. I'm lucky. I'm so lucky. They were still pulling bodies out from under the ground and I'm sitting at my computer at home having a decaf coffee and Chinese take-away. It could be any other day. If only I could get the image of the blown apart bus out of my head. The red blood on the walls. The news saying they couldn't confirm the number of dead. Without telling us, we all know it's because there aren't enough parts to identify.
36 hours after the bombs hit, 6 lines were closed on the tube: Bakerloo, Piccadilly, Victoria, Northern, Waterloo and City and Hammersmith and City. Also all of the Kings Cross Thames Link was down...which explained to me why the overground line at Upper Holloway had police tape up and policemen stationed there. They've even evacuated the entirety of Sheppard’s Bush.
It was all confusion here. No one knew what was happening. London had been put on alert beyond a red alert.
It's scary. I always pride myself that I am a strong and capable person. But when things like this happen...its terror attacks. If it goes on it'll make us no longer want to leave our flats. And as it became an everyday thing, I thought...do I keep writing my family and letting them know I'm OK or just let them assume that I am? Post 7/7 there were rumors flying around everywhere. There was supposedly a website saying that these strikes on the 'infidel Britain' will continue until all offending European parties are out of Iraq. That as the 'heart of Europe,' we are where they need to strike.
I think - what am I doing here. I work on a fitness website. I write poems and plays. I perform. Surely there is something I should do to make being somewhere where safety is becoming more fragile, more worthwhile.
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